Chris Bauer

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Bio

My muse shimmered in a knee-length white beaded dress, her black hair in a bob, and a champagne glass in hand. The Twenties ballad ‘More Than You Know’ teased in the background. She glared. When she last whispered into my ear she wore only my T-shirt.

I ignored her and banged away on the keyboard. “Like Raymond Chandler, Chris Bauer started selling short stories as an unemployed oil company executive. Since then he has accumulated thirty-six paid publishing credits, and is especially grateful to UNTREED READS—”

She tapped me on the shoulder. “That’s your BIO? Where am I?” She downed the remainder of the glass and sat beside me. The breath of her words caressed and seduced. “Write what I tell you.”

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Works

ALL RIGHTS REVERTED TO AUTHOR. AVAILABLE FOR REPRINTS.

 

“You Gotta Help Me, Doc” Copyright 2000

Heard and herd, and a lion in the potted plant.

 

“Travelling Justice” Copyright 2001

Be polite with fellow travelers, or there may be consequences.

 

“Say the Wrong Thing” Copyright 2001

How do you fix things you said but were taken the wrong way?

 

“Downsizing” Copyright 2001

Who decides which employees are unnecessary? And how?

 

“From the Corner of the Eye” Copyright 2001

Why can’t you see the back of your head? Why can you see only what’s in front of you?

 

“Employee Termination” Copyright 2001

Working hard to become a full time employee, and then unforeseen consequences.

 

“Quality Assurance” Copyright 2005

Even destructive flying monkeys have service quality issues. A FAVORITE ! ! !

 

“Professional Courtesy” Copyright 2005

Demons take many forms—not the shapes you would expect.

 

“The Contract” Copyright 2006

Timing is everything when switching bodies.

 

“Repetitive Stupidity Disorder” Copyright 2006

Making stupid mistakes may work to your advantage.

 

“Worldly Distractions” Copyright 2006

The search for lost love may span millennia.

 

“Megapizza” Copyright 2006

Ignore the pattern of your pizza toppings.

 

“Corporate Darwin”  Copyright 2007

Devolution in the corporate world

 

“The Law of Equivalence” Copyright 2008

Things work out, even if it is ugly getting to the end.

 

“Disposal” Copyright 2013

A Canaanite goddess,  a devious wife, and a garbage disposal

 

“Five Crisp Tens” Copyright 2016

A 1950’s detective learns that a victim isn’t always a victim